Thursday, March 12, 2009

Only in Dreams

I just forgave someone in a dream, and it made me forgive that person in real life.

This is an old hurt - an "over a year" hurt, and I realize now, waking, that I had never forgiven. I had forgotten, I had moved on, but never forgiven. And it took a ridiculous dream; a completely nonsensical subconscious voyage through a greeting card store, a farmer's market, my car, a thrift store, and my parents' backyard (curiously filled with domestic cats and Asian families). It took hanging out with this person while I was sleeping, and saying the things that I never got to say in waking life. It took the irrationality of making eighteen decisions in a single "day" (about 6 hours of sleep) and finally deciding to let go.

It makes me think that it doesn't matter how or if someone apologizes - when we're ready to forgive, we do.